The scene in X-Men where Senator Kelly liquifies and flows off of the examination table
Nigga just Alex Mack’d and was all like “PEaCE!”
If your date is going well, here’s a sure-fire way to seal the deal!
When you arrive at your apartment at the end of the night, invite her up for a night cap, while she is making herself comfortable in the living room put on track 3 from the RocketMan OST. Harland Williams makes that trim go all gooey and ready for landing if ya know what I mean!
Role playing the free version of your favorite iPhone game in an attempt to spice up your three year old marriage.
There’s only two things I really want out of life:
A houseboat
&
To know the sensation of hitting Rob Schneider in the groin with a Nerf crotch-bat
“Candy Boxes” is a rather deceiving term for those wall-mounted trash receptacles in women’s stalls. Every day I empty them with the rest of the trash and the only thing I find are melty Popsicles! They’re okay, but more of a frozen treat than a candy!
The excruciating part in that adventure game for 360 you keep failing where you’re an old man trying to maintain an erection through a series of overly complicated QTEs.
A guy who drinks coffee the morning after doing uppers is like a postcard with “PRIVATE” written in large letters on it.
